[Back, then front, then p.2 & p.3]
Here is my working final! The back cover is totally unfinished with assets just thrown on for future's sake, and I plan to put the quotes there. The other three pages are what I'm really looking for constructive criticism on. I think they're excellent, but that doesn't mean a whole lot in the end .:p I'm especially curious about what people think of the photos, namely my selection thereof. I'm also not completely confident in how they'll print, so I intend to test that out as soon as I can.
The back I'm not completely sure of what to do as well. Maybe a seventh photo? I'm extremely open to suggestion there.
As a side note, it was a personal goal of mine to include every passage in the manuscript in the final product. Given that I'm targeting women in higher education, I think being heavy on the content is a good thing, as it theoretically lends credibility.
Hi Nat, your work is looking, but in my opinion there some suggestion that you should take in consideration.
ReplyDelete1 - The stroke on both side are to large in my point of view, or you can just use just the stroke in the right side to give your newsletter the look of an open book.
2 - You don't have to use stroke around your photos, because is making your newsletter to color full, and also the blue strokes under your subtitles is to tick, you can make than more thin like the orange stroke that you have under some subtitles, and also u need more space between the strokes and the paragraphs under it.
3- In the back cover the logo, address, and the postage should be occupying the half top, and upside down, you can just look how I used my.
Thank you for your critiques, Elvis.
Delete1 - I think them being on both sides at least on the front and back works well. I'll try narrowing them a bit, though and see how that works out.
2 - I tried not stroking my photos and it admittedly looked really weird. I can play with the stroke weight and color some more, but without the stroke, the photos don't look like they belong. I think I agree with you on the blue rules, though, and will see how they look thinner.
3 - Thank you, I wasn't completely sure on how to do it.
4 - About the page numbers, I'll try taking them off on the back, but content-wise the front is part of the newsletter, so I think the front must have a "1" to make that clear.
Once again, thank you for your criticisms!
And one more thing, I don't think you have to show the page numbers in the first, and the last page.
ReplyDeleteNat - Some quick thoughts:
ReplyDeleteCover
Add some additional negative space below the blue lines, so the body copy doesn’t seem so close. Remove the page folio at bottom, and move the photos/body copy down a bit to allow more negative space below the masthead. Photos are crowding the colored bands along your trim edges - either allow the photos to move over those colored bands and off the page, or pull them away from the bands, allowing more negative space along those sides. You do not have enough words per line - the perfect line length is really between 6-9 words. So consider reducing the pt size just a bit and you must allow hyphenation - both of those actions should help the very very ragged right edges of your text columns.
Page 2/3
Both pages are really 1 composition - so consider cutting some type to allow the top photo on page 2 to move across the gutter and also sit at the top of page 3 - at least over an into that first column. These 2 pages should really serve as 1 design… which means that the articles can also spill over onto the next page… and in fact you will need some text at the bottom of page 4 (back cover)… so allow the columns of text to wrap around larger photos, and spill forward. I’m not sure you need all 3 lists, why not cut “Public Health..” and work some more negative space around your headings… these pages seem crowded and dense. Tiny photos at bottom of page 2 and top of page 3 need to be bigger. Remember to adjust the body copy, as I’ve suggested above.
Back Cover
Please refer to the handout I gave you about this page. The top 1/2 is the mailing panel, the bottom 1/2 should contain editorial (spill over from page 3, or a photo and quote, or whatever you think appropriate).
Hi Nat,
ReplyDeleteI think the little small image on page 2 and 3 is way to small. Maybe try stretching them out to two column instead of one.
Try adding a third color to your palettes, preferable one with a darker value, maybe a dark blue to create contrast with the bright color you have.
As for the borders for the image, You don't really need to have one but if you want one, then try to make it "fun", the rounded rectangle look kind of boring for your targeted audience which is young college students.
for the backcover, this might be difficult and require a high level Photoshop skill but you can try putting the book in your masthead at the bottom with a bunch of photos flying upward out of it.
Hi Nat,
ReplyDeleteI think the little small image on page 2 and 3 is way to small. Maybe try stretching them out to two column instead of one.
Try adding a third color to your palettes, preferable one with a darker value, maybe a dark blue to create contrast with the bright color you have.
As for the borders for the image, You don't really need to have one but if you want one, then try to make it "fun", the rounded rectangle look kind of boring for your targeted audience which is young college students.
for the backcover, this might be difficult and require a high level Photoshop skill but you can try putting the book in your masthead at the bottom with a bunch of photos flying upward out of it.
Hi Nat!
ReplyDeleteTo start, I'm definitely liking your color choice a lot more than the traditional pink that you had before hand. I also like the fact that you chose to incorporate all of what we were given for manuscript, although, usually with more manuscript there are far less pictures, which I'm sure isn't what you were going for because you do have a good amount of images (which I like). My thoughts for you:
- Everyone loves large images, but small images are debatable. Maybe try to resize your images so that they are all relatively similar in size if they are in with text and not being used as backgrounds. I'm just thinking of this idea because like Coni said, you could use a little bit more negative space just so the reader doesn't get overwhelmed and feel crowded. That way, you can have the best of both worlds; all of the pictures as well as all of the manuscript given.
- Boarders as well as rules are great, but I feel as though if you're going to use both you should make them all the same size. From what it looks like to me, the boarder around the images is much thinner than the rules you use under the titles. Try making the rules under the titles smaller, or make the boarders around the pictures bigger. You can also try taking one out and leaving the other. so see what it looks like to just have rules and see what it looks like to just have boarders around the images, it might give it a different look.
Overall, you have definitely come a long way from what you started with, great job!
Nat, I can't tell you how much more I appreciate this color palette! The blue and orange work very nice together. Much, much better than the pink!
ReplyDeleteFor the back cover, it is starting to look a little busy and crammed at the top. I don't think you need the original CAI logo since this is your version of the recreation. I also think it would be a good idea to add another element to the bottom half of your back cover like an enlarged photo.
I think the photos throughout your pages are much too close to the outside border. There is not enough breathing room between the two elements. Try adding some space or maybe decreasing the size of the photos. Also I think that there is not enough space between the bottom of the rule under the subheads and the body text. The body text almost hugs the rule under the subheads which again gives a bit of a clustered, tight feeling. Actually, I think you might have too many rules. I'm not sure you need all of them. They are starting to make the page very busy, and the rules are becoming more noticeable than they need to be. Try only keeping them under the main subheads and not the rest.
Overall I really appreciate the changes you've made, great progress!!